My daughter answered the phone the other day and the person on the line was speaking French to her. At some point in the conversation, she didn’t understand what was said and answered “Quoi?”, which is the equivalent of “What?” Both of my kids are taught that if I say something to them that they either do not hear or understand, the proper response is “What did you say?” Obviously, my daughter’s phone etiquette is still in the developmental stages.

So, I said to her that it’s impolite to say “Quoi?” when you don’t understand something. The polite response is “Pardon?” or “I beg your pardon?” She said okay and started to walk away. Then something clicked and she turned around to ask me “Why is saying ‘quoi’ impolite?” Oddly enough, I didn’t have the slightest clue.

I then told her that although she thinks that I’ve been alive since the beginning of time – the 1980’s according to her – I don’t know why every single rule was invented. I just follow them…which I suggested she do as well if she wanted her life to be a little easier. I’m all for questioning authority, but I guess when it comes to social norms I take them as they come. This may be because I’ve had to a lot of assimilating in my lifetime and going with the flow is facilitates that much more than fighting the establishment.

Have you ever wondered why certain social customs exist? Did you ever find the answer? If so, please share – a curious 8 year-old will be eternally grateful.

There’s a saying that anything causing you stress right now will be irrelevant a year from now. Anyone close to me has most likely heard me dole out these words of encouragement whenever they’re telling me about a difficult situation. I also try to remind myself of this when I’m starting to feel overwhelmed by the every day.

I’ve decided to test this theory by looking back (as well as my memory serves) at the problems that I had last year to see if they have any relevance now.

Haiti’s earthquake: I can’t say that this is completely irrelevant now, but a lot of the things I was worried about last year have sorted themselves out. We were very fortunate to have not lost any friends or family and no belongings sustained any damage. It was a question of waiting to hear about people every time we heard about an aftershock. By April, we started to hear less about the earth shaking and people started getting back to their routines.

Housing: Last March we were really looking into moving from our first apartment. We were having a difficult time because housing prices had doubled since my husband arrived 6 months prior. To top it off, there weren’t a lot of options in the area. I recall finding one we really liked even though it was a little far from stores, the kids school, etc. and the landlord pulled out at the last minute. At that point, we decided whatever will be, will be. Within a month, we found the apartment that we currently live in which is much more conveniently located and cheaper. So, this one gets a check…

Employment: One of my biggest concerns before moving here was whether or not I’d be able to find work in my field. I was assured by many that I would, but my gut was telling me otherwise. Well, by this time last year I started to realize that my gut was right and it would be a long road to full-time work. Well, I’m still unemployed, but the difference is I’ve completely accepted that it’s not going to happen here and have since come up with a plan (which will be revealed at a later date ). I’d give this one a check, as well.

Learning Spanish: I wasn’t stressing myself a whole bunch about this last year, but I knew I wanted to feel a lot more comfortable going out on my own. I didn’t see much improvement by simply immersing myself and was always getting tripped up on grammar. I eventually found this course at the French Alliance and May will make it one year. As I mentioned, we’ve shifted into intensive format and I’m amazed at how much progress I’ve made (yes, I’m patting myself on the back). Even though this is a work in progress, it definitely gets a check!

So what, that’s 3 out of 4 – not bad. What do you think about this theory? Have you found it to be true for your stressful phases?